Getting Positive & Energized

It happens to all of us at one time or another. Even the smartest, savviest, hippest women have to job hunt once in a while. We know that looking for a job is hard—most of all on your self-esteem. But don't let yourself get depressed: there is light at the end of the tunnel. But seriously, depression can indeed creep up, and it's crucial to stay positive and focused. Remember Eleanor Roosevelt's famous line: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Easier said than done? Here's how to keep your spirits up if the job hunt starts to get you down:

Don't panic. Freaking out over your inability to find a job only causes more stress and headache—two things you really don't need. It's important to stay calm and in control of your emotions because a levelheaded jobseeker is more successful than a frantic one.

Rise and shine, baby. Don't fall into the trap of sleeping late and lounging around in your PJs. Wake up early and start your day as if you were reporting in for a full-time job—because job hunting is your job now. Waking up on a regular schedule—even if it is an hour or so later than normal—will keep you motivated and feeling like your time is valuable.

Don't become a hermit. Socializing, also known as networking, is a critical piece to your success. Tell everyone you meet that you are in a career transition right now and ask if they have a good connection for you. Remember the old cliché, it's who you know, not just what you know. Your friends and acquaintances can be the best source of job leads.

Find a partner in crime. The best way to feel like you're not alone in your job search is not to go it alone. Go out of your way to find other motivated women who are in the same boat and commit to doing this together. Impromptu brainstorming sessions with this support person or group can lead to new ideas and new opportunities. If you don't know anyone who's looking, try attending job search seminars and lectures at local colleges, libraries, and community organizations to find simpaticos. Just like having a gym buddy, a job-seeking pal helps keep you going.

Do it daily. It's important to schedule job-hunting time into your calendar, especially if you are working full time or part time or you tend to procrastinate. We recommend at least three hours a day—whether it's working on your résumé, making networking calls, scanning online job boards, or meeting potential connections. By giving your job search the same, if not more, importance as any other activity in your routine, you are more likely to accomplish your goals.

Let's get physical. Pounding the pavement shouldn't be the only exercise you get. This is definitely a great time to start or step up your regimen. Lifting weights can lift your spirits too. Exercise is a great deterrent to depression. From an hour at the gym to an extra walk for the dog, the message is keep moving because an adrenaline boost can do wonders for the psyche.

Avoid strangling your parents, husband, partner, or children. Concerned family members—to put it mildly—want to know why their angel isn't having much luck. Parents have spent a pretty penny on your education or they know you're the greatest thing since sliced bread—maybe even both. Perhaps an unfeeling significant other grouses about the piling bills. Their anxiety and pestering can drive you nuts. Instead of screaming at your loved ones, enlist their help. First have a calm conversation in which you explain how difficult this transition is on you, and while you appreciate their concern, it's also distracting to deal with. Then ask them for contacts and suggestions. You may be surprised at who they and their friends know.

Don't be ashamed of part-time work. It's completely acceptable to take a part-time job while you're looking for your next big move. Even in an interview you can give part-time work a positive spin. If someone asks what you're doing, try this response: "Actually I'm waitressing right now, which is great because I can't afford to be without any income and the schedule is quite flexible, so I can focus a lot of time on my job search. And you never know who I might meet!" Part-time work in a job environment that you are interested in might also lead to a full-time position. Don't be shy about considering any position that will get you back to work, even if it's not quite at the level or in the industry you want. Not only would that provide some income, it is also good experience to list on a résumé. Plus it can be easier to find a job when you have one.

Don't focus only on one particular position. Just like that hot guy you obsessed about in high school, it's a natural tendency to aim all of your energy in one direction. But in a job search it is a huge mistake to set your heart on one job or even one company. You cannot count on any single opportunity working out, no matter how perfect it seems. If you see a listing screaming your name, it may be filled internally before you even apply. You may have wanted to work for IBM your whole life, but this may be the season they have a hiring freeze. Cast a wide net, and do not let one position consume too much of your search time.

Don't let one rotten apple spoil the bunch. A smart, highly educated pharmaceuticals industry executive was looking for a new position with a bigger company. She got in touch with the alumni association of her MBA program and asked for a contact name from each of the companies she was interested in. So far, so good. But when the job seeker made her first phone call, introducing herself and mentioning their connection, the MBA colleague rudely rejected her and said, "Just because we went to school together doesn't mean I have time for you." The woman was horrified (and rightly so, there's never a need to be so rude!) and vowed never to make another cold call, deciding only to look for jobs on the Internet and through close friends. This fear of cold calling probably cost her many good opportunities. Rejection is going to happen. It's an inevitable part of job searching. Rejection from others, particularly other women, can be very upsetting, but you have to get over it and move on. The next phone call could be the winner.

Reward yourself. Looking for a job can be a long and arduous process, so it's important to enjoy small achievements along the way. Set goals and assign an affordable reward for getting things done. How about a manicure for every ten résumés sent? Or a night at the movies for each informational interview? No cheating!